Random Thoughts

For the last week or so, I've had insomnia. A few times this week, I've taken a sleep pill to help out. Normally, one good night of sleep reboots my system and I'm back on track. But not this week. I'm sure it is stress/anxiety related. Note to self: up medication dosage. In the meantime, I figured that I'd better get back to my blogging and purge out some of the random thoughts that I've had over the last few weeks....

Thanksgiving has come and gone. I'm sure that I gained at least 2 pounds. Guess I'd better hit the gym a little harder this week. Anyway, I did reflect on the many blessings that are in my life throughout that day and the days since. I, like most, count my family, friends and health as a blessing and am extremely thankful to have each.

And with the passing of Thanksgiving comes the Christmas season. I could post on how consumer oriented it has become, and probably will do so in the near future. For now, I just want to vent my bitterness toward the Salvation Army for sending out those bell ringers 2 weeks before Thanksgiving. Now, I don't mean to sound bah-humbug....but Thanksgiving, the holiday, gets more and more lost every year. The one day that we can just count our blessings and be thankful is getting snuffed out between Halloween and Christmas. I just want a little separation. Can we please enjoy Thanksgiving without big business shoving their agenda down our throats? I'm all for supporting charity, but PLEASE....keep the bell ringers at bay until we've eaten our turkey! Is that so much to ask?!?

Ok....onto other things that are chapping my backside right now. Umm...I just watched "Sicko" and gave it 2 thumbs up. Very thought provoking and worth checking out. The part the chaps my backside is the greed of HMOs and the lack of dedication that our government has in the matter of taking care of the least of these in our country.

On another note, Kenny and I are shopping for a house. We actually put a bid in this evening on a house in our neighborhood. It's a foreclosed house...bank owned...and about $35k under market value. For that price, we're willing to sacrifice the big yard and spend 2 years living in it. After 2 years, we'll see about selling it along with the Reno house and then buying something a little more suitable...mostly, something with a larger yard. Well, I guess I shouldn't get too ahead of myself. The bank has to accept our offer first. If they do, I'll post progress pictures on the house. Right now, it needs a major clean job and new carpets. We'll probably add new counter tops in the kitchen as well. But like I said, I need not put the carriage before the horse.

I guess that's it for now. Just sitting here bored and AWAKE. I think I'll add some more songs to my myspace play list/jukebox. Either that, or maybe I'll go rearrange the pots and pans in the kitchen cabinets. Good Lord...please let me get drowsy soon!

While My Guitar Gently Weeps

Three summers ago, I was experiencing recurring dreams. There were two of them actually; one of which I still experience regularly. But the other one hasn't interrupted my slumbers since that summer.

In the dream, I played a purple acoustic guitar. That's pretty much the summary of the dream. I never pulled anything out of it except the fact that I was playing an acoustic guitar and it was purple. End of dream. The part that bothered me was the fact that the dream continued to visit me. What did it mean? I didn't know and didn't bother to make any attempts at deep interpretation.

But then one day, we were up in Medford visiting my parents and happened to drive by a Guitar Center. I mentioned my dream to Kenny and he quickly offered to pull into the parking lot. Next thing you know, we are inside and I am explaining my dream to a sales rep. I wondered out loud if my creativity need was not being satisfied and that this was my subconscious begging me to do something about it. He gladly scoured the stock room and resurfaced with none other than a beautiful Ibanez purple acoustic guitar. He noted the slim neck for my small hands and pretty much worked every angle that he knew how to in hopes of a sale.

About 2 hours later we left the store, not with a guitar mind you, but with an electronic drum set which is an instrument that I already know how to play. I figured that my creativity cravings would be satisfied by banging on that a little each day. Still, weeks later I couldn't shake the remembrance of that guitar. So with a coy grin, I confessed my obsession to Kenny. About a week later, I was strumming out my first chords.

In character with my ADD/OCD personality, the guitar only captured my attention for a few months. A pregnancy and everything that follows took priority and I began storing it in the closet; out of sight-out of mind. Not even my "actually-played-Purple-Rain-with-Prince's-own-hands" pick motivated me to strum out a song.

Well, I finally pulled it back out about 2 weeks ago and started practicing again. My fingertips are numb and beginning to callous and I beat myself up with my desire for excellence. But I'm stubborn and persistent and really do want to learn how to play. So, last night I played for about an hour and even though the songs were not anywhere near perfectly timed, it was very therapeutic. My fans think I'm better than what I actually am. The dogs tilt their heads to the side and stare at me in wonderment and my boys dance around in mosh pit style. I'm a far cry from Hendrix, but to my boys I'm the coolest mom on the block. And, I guess that's reason enough to continue strumming along.